The first time I went on an overnight business trip after becoming a mom I convinced hubby to put in for leave and schlepped my two boys across the country with me. The reality is though, that I can’t do this every time and the next time I had to go on my own. I could not stop the tears dripping down my face from the moment I set foot in the airport until I landed in Johannesburg. I really hope that I managed to catch the tears without anyone seeing.
Once I got to work in Joburg though, the day swept me away and I hardly had a moment to think (or express – can I say eina!?). It was weird stepping back into my old life. Especially because it was once again (for a limited time) my life without a baby. I can’t deny that I didn’t enjoy wearing clothes that weren’t breastfeeding friendly, staying out at a function until I felt like leaving and bathing for however long I felt like bathing (even if it was 1am). But being away from him still feels like the most unnatural thing. Even though I enjoy the luxury of me time I am quite aware that this phase if parenthood flies by so quickly that the thought of being separated for even one night seems unbearable. It did not feel real.
I hope that one day I will be able to write a post about ways to deal with separation from your baby because then I would perhaps have figured out how to be less heartbroken. But for now I will focus on the fact that I really do love my job, that my work team has been really understanding about my hesitancy to travel straight after having my baby, and that I have a supportive family and lovely nanny who take care of my darling while I am away.
* Yes, I am melodramatic. In fact I also have a BDram degree. 🙂