What is a working mom? I have been giving this quite a bit of thought lately and this is my conclusion – ‘working’ moms, work-from-moms and housewives are all working mothers.
We all know women love to compete. Just look all the brands jumping on the end-mommy-wars bandwagon – no one would invest millions in these advertising campaign without first doing their research to know that it is relevant. Well no marketer worth their salt anyway. But I digress. For working mothers to ever find a life with some level of equality they need to admit just how much of a job being a stay at home mother is. For women to ever find equality in society I believe that we first need the world to acknowledge how much ‘work’ women have been doing in the home in the traditional roles as housewives. Therefore unless this full time job (work load and responsibility) is split equally between the two parents then the one (usually the mother) will effectively end up working two full time jobs.
The flipside is that we need to stop treating fathers like they are God’s gift to the world if they they dare lift a finger to help. Surely when the wife is working just as hard at bringing in an income it should be expected. It should be the norm?
Here is another idea that is bumping around in my head that I thought that I would share before calling it a night: I have noticed that whenever people visit a home and they feel like it isn’t beautifully decorated, or that it is messy, dirty or that the food isn’t up to scratch, they almost always judge the wife.The same goes for social engagements. If a couple does not visit enough, host enough, fulfill certain social graces or the like the judgement is more often than not placed on the wife. Regardless as to whether the poor woman is holding down a job just as tough as the husband.
So, I always love to ask: “What now? How do we fix this?” Perhaps here’s a start:
- Let’s start acknowledging just how tough and how much work it actually is to be a traditional full time stay-at-home-mother
- Let’s start expecting men to step up instead of being pleasantly surprised when they do
- Let’s stop automatically judging women based on the 1950’s idea of what a woman should be
I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences about this topic.